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Brutal Heat; Meeting Nancy Lopez; Hostel or Hostile? No Margarita for Ty! Free Golf Balls and A Screen Test

You folks who have lived through (endured) the past Florida summer have my admiration (and my sympathy). A couple of weeks ago, we checked the weather report for The Villages and saw a high of 74F. I made the assumption (remember what “assume” means?) that the summer was transitioning to pleasant fall temperatures and low humidity. Funny how dumb you feel when you go out for a six mile run and it’s harder than a 13 miler in upstate New York. I was nearing heat exhaustion when I finished, and had lost 2 lbs in sweat. (As an aside, Wonder Woman is out in our sweltering garage right now lifting weights, but she doesn’t “sweat”… she “glistens”… that’s much more ladylike, don’t you think?) 

Today I decided to splurge with the remainder of our savings from cleaning The Bus ourselves, so we went to Chick-fil-A for chicken sandwiches and a milkshake. To our surprise, inside was a table set up for a charity called Adventures in Movement (AIM) for the Handicapped, and there was golf legend Nancy Lopez, greeting people and encouraging donations to AIM, her favorite charity. We agreed to help, and you will find one of their donation cans at each of Suzanne’s events this year. As “Dr. Jo” Geiger, AIM’s National Director reminded us, “Folded bills are much lighter and less noisy than coins!” Nancy will be hosting the 32ndAIM/Nancy Lopez Golf Tournament here in The Villages 6-7 October. For more info on AIM, see aimforthehandicapped.org.
We are planning a short winter trip back out to Colorado, and I thought I’d look into reasonable lodging for a few days; you know, something cozy, unique, lively, maybe where we could meet some interesting people, like college girls (AKA “eye candy”) on winter break. Suzanne asked where I was looking, and I said that it would fun to stay in a youth hostel. There was a pause, and My Loving Wife replied, “If it’s a hostel, you’re going to have a hostilewife…” (Whoops, maybe I’d better re-think our accommodations…) “Yes, Dear… I think there is an AARP-recommended hotel nearby…”

As I have mentioned, Suzanne’s mom Ruthie is A Doll, and likes to cook for me. I occasionally reciprocate, so the other night I met Ruthie at the door with a margarita in hand. Sadly, My Lovely Bride does not allow me to drink tequila any more, following a memorable incident when we were first married. The details are a bit hazy, at least to me, but we had a couple of margaritas at dinner while moving into our first house, and I was later found in a cardboard wardrobe box in the bedroom… So what’s her point?

Ty’s Famous Chicken Enchiladas were on the menu, so I set to work preparing that Gastronomic Delight. Also joining us for dinner was Elizabeth Magee, our good friend from across the golf course and Suzanne’s spiritual sister. Elizabeth told us about her recent trip to China, Tibet, and Cambodia; Joseph was still recovering from jet lag, so couldn’t join us that evening. (I hope he wasn’t offended by my ambulance-chaser comment in a recent blog… he is a retired lawyer.) It was a fun evening. 

We were fortunate to find a house located on a golf course when we moved to The Villages five years ago. It is located at about 200 yards from the white tees on Amelia #2, one of the championship courses in The Villages. I had never played golf when we moved here, and thought how neat an experience living right next to the fairway would be. Also, one of the advantages of living on a golf course are the free golf balls, right? I must have been out of my mind that day. These four balls that we found in our lanai and yard yesterday would normally cost about, what, maybe $6 to $8 total? Pretty good deal, free golf balls, right? 
Well, it may be until you add up repairs for one broken window and four lanai screens (yes, of course they are all on the top where I can’t reach, so DIY won’t work). Did you know that lanai screens are not designed to repel golf balls traveling at a terminal velocity of 150 feet per second? A conservative estimate of $600.00 in repairs make these golf balls ring in at $150.00 each. I will be more than happy to return them to their owners, but plan on bringing your checkbooks or a wad of twenties when you stop by. 

Yes, I know, I know…. I chose to live here. But that doesn’t make it any easier when it comes time to fix screens and windows!


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